Showing posts with label Love Thursday. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Love Thursday. Show all posts

Thursday, February 01, 2007

So few words, so many syllables...

Princess Stinkbutt becomes an officially 2-year old person tomorrow. Thanks to the help and support of the royal family, as well as friends a plenty and her rockin' school, the princess can, so far, do all of the following:
  • body parts identification (yours or hers)
  • animal noises (with special skill at quiet bear)
  • Row, Row, Row any Boat you give her
  • show you her handle as well as her spout
  • dance, dance, dance, baby!
  • allow water to touch her face both via submersion and bathtub waterfall
Things still on her highness' "to do" list:
  • talk
Don't misunderstand, because she's by no means quiet. She and I probably spend the same amount of time a day making sounds via the mouth-type-face-part. But where as for me it's all about using the fanciest, bestest words I can conjure (like, for instance, conjure!) the wee pri-shizzle does it all through her own special brand of 'no-actual-words-were-harmed-or-used-during-the-creation-of-this-sentence' language-ishness. I find this pretty amazing, because I have it on pretty good authority (i.e. my own guess) that I came out of the womb talking exactly this much and this fast. I have always felt like if I couldn't talk I'd freeze up completely as a person. Petrofide Femtastic. Oh the horror.

That's why I love hanging with the princess. Princess in da house, yo! Because she reminds me over and over that one can communicate volumes, even without actual words. She encourages me to use the facial expression, the hand gestures, the rollicking hip-toss and oh the inflections, inflections, IN-FLEC-TIONS! Through this stuff she gets it done! You know from when comes she most of the dang time!

So tomorrow she and the Queen will hang for the day, and this weekend is pock-marked with "Princess Stinkbutt is 2!" celebrations, complete with cupcakes, toddlers and sing-sing-singing! There are rumors of crowns (as would only befit a chick of her royal stature) and visits from cousins who share the same awesome birthdate.

I'm just hoping she and I get a chance for a good, long talk.

Happy Wove, Thursday, y'all! Here's to showing the wove w/out the words.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

Excedrin, Sexschmedrin...

I get the occassional migraine headache. I've also found the occassional treatment that will work, but only for a little while.
Tangent: my last miracle cure was Excedrin Migraine, and it worked so very well! Right up to the day that The Queen got all smart and pointed out to me that the ingredients for regular Excedrin (which had never had much luck w/ the evil migraine headache) and the ingredients for Excedrin Migraine (and remember, that stuff worked faboo!) were EXACTLY THE SAME. Same stuff, same amounts... No reason that one would work different then the other. She thought she was being helpful -- "now you don't have to buy 2 kinds of Excedrin" -- but sadly what she did was shatter the fragile-but-beautiful crystal palace of 'fooling myself' which I'd built entirely on the foundation of "Excedrin Migraine? Well it has Migraine in the title so it MUST be special!" In other words: now I don't have to buy Excedrin Migraine because it promptly stopped working on my migraines. Sigh.
Anyway, at last, after 15+ years of being laid low by these mysterious demons of horrendous head-hurting I think I've found the best cure of all!



Happy Wove, Thursday everyone -- I hope you all have wove therapy available for what ails ya!

*The poster takes no responsibility for any adverse reactions the reader may have to exposure of such overwhelming cuteness. If you get busted for going "aaaawwwwww!" at work you are on your own!

Thursday, January 11, 2007

She's one of THOSE people...

We all have these people in our lives. Here is mine:

She's an artist. She can paint, draw, quilt (and I'm talking those quilts where you'd never put it on a bed for fear that someone might EVER put their nasty old pooper on it!); she makes art books, art dolls, jewelry, funky scarves and hats and a million other things, and most of these talents she discovered when she just decided to try it one day and "oh hey, look at that: I'm fantastic at this as well..."


She's a writer. She has a blog of her own (it's partially her fault that I'm even doing this, so here's someone you could blame.) which I won't link to (protecting the innocent and, in this case, the fabulous!) but she can add in the comments if she so chooses. She also writes poetry (or did when we were younger, and it was, by the way, good poetry even though she was a young lady who should have been writing about gloom and doom and how hard it is to be young and beautiful) and clever quotes that poor Bartleby.com will never get their hands on.


She's insane-smart. She'll tell you flat out that she's been clocked doing genius tph (thoughts per hour), and that's on city streets -- imagine her highway smarts! And once you meet her that seems like a ridiculously obvious thing to say, because Well Duh!, she's that smart!


She's 'totally-unfair-to-the-rest-of-us' beautiful. This is now as it has ever, ever been. In the time I've known her (some 30+ years, by the way, so I know of what I speak.) she's always had people (note the lack of gender label here -- EVERYONE finds her foxy!) falling out of the sky for the priviledge of watching her walk by. An old memory for me was all the times that I went out with her and the Queen and got digits, digits, digits. Of course these phone numbers were to pass along to the wonder twins!


She's 'when-I-wet-my-pants-from-the-laughing-you'd-better-help-hide-it!' funny, especially when she, her highness and I all get together. We bring out the best/worst of each other, which is just what old, old friends are supposed to do, right? So we've got clearance there, but we should probably wear a large warning label for those sitting within earshot, because they're really the innocent ones. They don't know to bring the change of underwear!


I know what you're saying now: "why the hell would you know such a person? These people, who are throwing off the curve for the rest of us, should at LEAST be alone and lonely and miserable and such, right?" And in theory I agree with you. But here's the problem: I've known this woman for... wait, how long is a coon's age? Whatever, I'm sure it's been at least 4 or 5 coon's ages. Since we were that age where they used to say folks were in knee pants! And here's what that means, which makes it all the more unfair:


-she knows me backwards and forwards and STILL admits to being affiliated when we're in public.

-we totally end each other's sentences and complete each other's movie quotes and harmonize on each other's humming.

-she used to dress me pretty when I thought someone cute might be somewhere cool and I wanted to matter! (I've never been able to dress me pretty. And she knows how to make pretty much anything pretty.)

-she's constantly making and gifting these amazing mixed CDs which have just the right mix of "woah, this is so cool, who IS this?" and "oh cool, I haven't heard this song in so dang long!" You can't ask me to give up on the music fixes, people. Not cold turkey!

-she's been responsible for introducing me to countless other fabulous people in my universe, including her brother (The King -- you'll meet him later), The Queen and many more. She's like one of those gifts that just keep on giving.


...I hate to admit this, but I could go on and on here. Basically, she's one of those people. And yet wove her still? Yes, I'm afraid I do -- I'll Risk it. So happy Wove, Thursday people, to my Risky and all of those people and we who love them, even though they're far too, too, too...

Thursday, December 14, 2006

Wove is...

...helping your parents finish the latest model so that they can finally start enjoying the holidays! And as such I'm not gonna be able to Wove, Thursday this week. Sorry folks -- see you next Thursday!

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

It's beginning to look a lot like...

Wove, Thursday!

I know it's all the rage to rage about this time of the year, and though I'd like to be edgy I just ain't. I confess it here and now: I wove Christmas!

But first, my brief definition of Christmas: That month at the end of the year where everyone is their very best them; when you remember favorite times from childhood, when there are decorations and songs and food and parties and everything is just that much better. It culminates with a day where you give presents to your loved ones and stand there grinning like a doof while they open them, and then you eat til you want to be murdered by a benevolent loved one. And then eat more. And more. And seriously? Yes, more.

There's no religion in my Christmas. It's cool with me if anyone else wants to add religion to their holiday, but for me this one (like all the others) is about family and friends and love and happiness, but not about religion. It's also about tradition. Craploads and craploads of cool, sentimental, make you gulpy traditions, my people. (And the food thing, which I really can't mention enough!)

I wove the whole friggin' time! I wove:
  • Watching "A Charlie Brown Christmas," "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer" and "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" on tv and cranking the volume during all the songs
  • That Peppermint candy flavor of ice cream that you can't seem to get any other time of the year!
  • Tromping around the tree farm du jour (except "of the year" rather than "of the day" but whatever) looking for the tree with the right amount of space between the branches for the long ornaments
  • The look on my Mom's face the first time I put on Nat King Cole's Christmas album just for her
  • sitting with my dad at some ungodly hour of Christmas morning, having both finished and wrapped our final Christmas projects, now basking in the lovely white glow of the Christmas lights on the tree, which is itself totally overwhelmed by beautiful packages.
I could so go on and on. It's sappy and gushy and I get gulpy and I know everyone likes to complain about the cost and the consumerism and the stress and all of it, but to them I just feel bad, because they're doing it wrong. My Christmas? It's awesome. Happy Holidays, everyone, and Happy Wove, Thursday.

Thursday, November 30, 2006

I get by with a little help from The Queen!

I'm kind of a collector. Always have been. As a kid I collected comic books, 45's (ask your parents what they are) and Taco Bell commemorative Looney Tunes glasses to name a few. The older I got the more things I've collected: shot glasses and martini glasses (yet I don't drink -- I'm an enigma.), CDs (like 45's but longer and shinier), things with moons on them and Muppets action figures. (just skimming the surface -- don't get me started here.)

But of all the things which I collect I'd say the best, coolest, most impressive and most valuable collection is my friends. I have friends I've known since they were 3, 4, 5 years old! Friends from Jr. high school. Friends from highschool. I've lost some friends and then found them again! Seriously, my collection of friends just rocks, and some of them are really hard to find. For instance, I've got the rare "friend which you had a seriously bad blow out with, where both sides felt totally betrayed, and yet you are still friends" friend and the "to this day many people think that the friend had a crush on you, though there have only been denials about it" friend; rare enough on it's own, but when paired as a set with my "you had a major crush but never got a chance to tell before they met the love of their life" friend and the collection is just about complete!

One friend showed me her love by asking me to be there for the most important moment of her life so far: the birth of her child. We call the little bean Princess Stinkbutt (among 40 skillion nicknames coined in the last 2 years!)

But today I'm talking about The Queen. Princess Stinkbutt's mom, who is one of those friends in my collection. She's also one I lost for a time. I put her down in a city clear across the country and someone moved her when I wasn't looking. I asked around to see if anyone knew what I'd done with her, and sometimes other friends would tell me where the saw her last, but she was never there when I went back for her. And then I was stupid and stopped looking. And f*cking years passed.

But then one time I turned around and there she was, practically exactly where I'd left her in the first place! And we did that impossible thing of not only rekindling the connection but making it stronger! And today there are three things that I can say about The Queen that I cannot say about many others in my collection:

She keeps all of my secrets
She has seen me cry and still thinks I'm strong
When I make her laugh I feel like the priviledged one.

Important, IMPORTANT note: I have so many amazing friends, and this is the not last time a Wove, Thursday will be dedicated to a friend. You'll either be seriously jealous of my collection or totally sick of my friends before I'm done. Because my collection of friends is one of the most impressive ever there was. But I wanted to start with royalty. Ladies and Gentlemen, long live the Queen, and happy Wove, Thursday.

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Here's to us, Who's Like us?...

...damned few! (ooh, musically-inspired, holiday potty-mouth-- sassy!)

OK, so imagine this: you're in this club. The club is full of all of these really amazing people, who are smart and funny and generous and talented and stuff like that. And all the people in the club love hanging out together, playing games together, do hobbies, classes, things together... they have in-jokes and catch-phrases, but for the most part they don't make you wear any club "gear" like sweat suits or special hats w/ ears attached.

Imagine that there are some accepted rules of this club, which include:
  1. everyone is accepted as they are, including some level of wartiness
  2. everybody is allowed to, and expected to, speak their mind, and if things get testy somebody will pretty much always drop a joke-bomb to clear the air
  3. since nobody's perfect anyway we're just gonna air each other's faults openly, usually as part of a high-larious anecdote (note: teller of initial story should expect a counter-story to follow from subject of first story. Repeat as necessary)
  4. never, ever drink the last Pepsi in the house
  5. there is no such thing as "enough food" at any club gathering
  6. he who smelt it, dealt it, unless Squirrely* is in the room
  7. once you're a member of the club you are a member for life. Whether you want to be or not (like the mob, but not nearly as much pasta or church)

Final rule: you wove each other. You can also frustrate each other, resent each other, mock each other or, in some remote instances, hate each other. But the "wove each other" rule is always in effect regardless.

Now I'm sure your next question has gotta be "How does one get into your club?" In my case it was the classic story of "when one member of the club finds a new member to bring into the club, and they wove each other very much..." and then, of course, bow-chicka-bow-bowm... But regardless of whether you got born in, brought in or dragged in, rule #7 is always in effect. We had a big club gathering today and now I'm sitting here full of food and drink and the buzz of club wove. For my club I give many, many Thanks.

Happy Wove, Thursday, everyone!

(*note: once again, names have been changed to protect the innocent. But if they're reading, they know who they are...)

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

For her I buried many squirrel butts.

About 25 days ago my roommate and I decided to wrap up a 15 year partnership. We'd been together since she was the size of 2 tennis balls, though some of my people gave her refuge during a couple of years when I couldn't have her myself. Our bond had many facets, but I think the most significant thing she taught me was the possibility of unconditional wove.

I really want to be clear here: I get this magical product from a bunch of people in my life. Most everyone in my family, many of my friends, and some local politicians if their promises are to be believed. But I honestly think that it's been pretty easy to live up to that with my human connections.

True unconditional wove is seeing the rear 1/2 of a squirrel on the kitchen floor as the gift that it is.

It's taking elaborate steps to coax the live bird she brought home back out of the house, while simultaneously avoiding the crap bombs it's dropping.

Claw gouges on your back from an escape attempt, as you wash the motor oil out of her coat for the third time? That's wove of the unconditional variety.

We're talking spending a week, and your annual bonus, on a radiation treatment for a hyper thyroid, not to mention taking her poop to the hazardous waste part of the dump for the week afterward. (it didn't glow -- I checked.)

But it went both ways, I assure you. She put up with my constantly throwing away her gifts of love-carnage. She let me sing along with the music in my headphones and only occasionally used her claws to let me know she was done. She defended me and our home from so many other cats, dogs, raccoons and possums, though she always lost interest in the big, hairy spiders once she'd crippled 'em but good. She suffered vacuum cleaners, alarm clocks and window fans and still looked fabulous.

Tonight I'm finally taking her name off of our answering machine, dumping out her unused litter pan and donating her bed to the animal shelter. The battle is over and I'll consider it a win even though she's gone. Because we got to be together to the very end. But she set the bar for unconditional wove pretty damn high. I pity the fool who has to step up and jump it.

Happy wove, Thursday, folks. I'll finish the adventures of rejectioning next time.

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Love, Thursday #1

Ladies and Gents, meet both my inspiration and the impossible dream, all rolled into one. These lovely peoples be my parents. We'll call them Mom and Dad -- they'll answer to it and everything.

Mom and Dad have been married for almost 45 years. And to each other the whole time! (no, seriously!) Growing up I was one of those kids who's parents were considered weird because they hadn't found the fight that could kill them yet. They loved each other, and even more strange I guess is that they liked each other at the same time. And strangest of all: apparently (if this shot is to be believed) they still do!

(By the way, I should mention that I like them both too. Always have. My favorite people, really. Wait until you get to know them, I'm sure you'll love them too.)

Anyway, when people see a kid who's parents are together for so long they naturally expect that the kid will also find their sweet baboo and settle down to "love me always and I'll do the same and I'll even let the little stuff slide if you will" bliss. My sister did it, but she's always been an over-achiever. Show off, really -- she got her home run on the second time at bat! (and by "at bat" I'm talking dudes, not marriages or anything dirty.) In fact, just about everyone in my whole extended family is paired off, so I really am the blackest of black sheepies amongst my people!

But here's the deal: when you see it so good for so long it sets a very high bar and I'm really not willing to compromise on what I want from wove. I don't think I should have to. After all, they didn't! No, wove and I are gonna have to work this out, but in the end I either get all that I want from wove, or wove keeps on a-walkin'. (I'm 2 wuh-words away from baby talk here!)

So here on my first entry into Love, Thursday (or I should say Wove, Thursday) I present to you all what I aspire to achieve. If it's worth doin', it's worth doin' right! Happy Wove Thursday.