Wednesday, April 11, 2007

100 things about Femtastic...

OK, so I'll move this over to the "About Me" (just as soon as I figure out how to do it) but I figured I'd post this here for two, very important reasons. First, it's the best way for all of my patient readers to finally see what I've come up with. Second, MAN it's been a while since I've posted!! Bad me, BAD ME!!! Anyhoo, here's the list. I'm confident that most of it is probably true.

  1. I've been single since 1996. I'm not sure I want to change, but I'm open to whatever comes next. (update:  in 2009 I met T.E. and stopped being single.  As it turned out changing was awesome)
  2. I come from a family of married people -- we're not much for divorcing.
  3. I have 2 cats -- Mr. Man (all black) and Lulu (calico)
  4. I like to think I'm a photographer (check Snapstastic.blogspot.com to decide for yourself)
  5. I own no ipod. (The future scares me.)  However a couple of years ago I got an iPhone. (apparently the future didn't scare me THAT much)
  6. Instead I prefer to own music in smaller, self-contained units of measure. My people call them "CDs"
  7. At this time my CD collection numbers just short of 400 disks
  8. I have two tattoos and have a third I'm dying to add. But I feel like I can't do it justice until I no longer work for "The Man"
  9. Right now I work in a lame office job. It's a decent way to pay the rent but I live for weekends and holidays (update:  yeah, this has changed too.  But you'll have to read the blog for that knowledge)
  10. I'm still not sure what I want to be when I grow up
  11. Whatever it is, it won't include math, science or filling out paperwork.
  12. I live in the upper left-hand quarter of the US of A...
  13. ...in a small town that has been home (no matter where I was living) since I was 2. I call it Hippyville
  14. I performed improvisational comedy for 6 years in Washington, DC
  15. I'm kind of afraid of horses. They're very big and powerful and I got beat-up by one once when I was little.
  16. Few things delight me as much as the Muppets. I've seen all the shows, the movies... LOVE THEM!
  17. I take loyalty to an absurd level.
  18. I don't read books very much. Certainly not as much as I should. I should really read more books.
  19. Then again, when I do read I can get obsessive about it.
  20. I've read and re-read The Princess Bride, Ender's Game and all of the Milne Pooh books.
  21. I talk a bunch. A big bunch. Most people think I can hold my breath for a really long time because of how much I talk.
  22. IalsotalkfasterthenanybodyyouknowohyesIdonoseriouslyjusttrustmeonthis!
  23. I have a huge collection of comic books. I'd still collect but I can't keep track of the schedule
  24. I hung my magnetic poetry set next to the toilet for deeper output and get magical things like "chocolate is an elaborate apparatus for delicate arms." So true. So true.
  25. I sleep with the TV on.
  26. When I don't have the tv on I have dreams so vivid that they exhaust me by morning
  27. Yes, I do know that everybody says you should never sleep with the TV on. But they need to spend a night in my brain!
  28. I hate to exercise. I wish I didn't hate it so, but I do
  29. But I really like playing Paintball and Laser Tag.
  30. All of my relationships have been long distance ones. The closest I've ever lived to a partner was a 2-hour drive.
  31. I design jewelry in my spare time. 'Cause beads are cool. Yes they are. (yes they are.  shut up.  no YOU shut up.)
  32. The only sport I enjoy to watch is NASCAR. (can you believe I'm still single?)
  33. I used to dream of seeing James Taylor in concert because I adore him.
  34. Then I got to see him in concert. TWICE!
  35. The second time he signed my Dad's vinyl copy of Sweet Baby James, and the crowd went WILD.
  36. Now I'm dreaming of seeing the Police in concert. Summer 2007, baby!
  37. I have irrational fears of heights, large bodies of water and the Dentist. Especially the dentist. (oh how I hate you, Doctor of Pain!)
  38. Some day I really do want to jump out of a plane. (with a parachute! With a parachute!)
  39. One of my tattoos is Winnie the Pooh. (Edwin Shepard illustration, not Disney Pooh. I spit on Disney Pooh.)
  40. I never went to college. I wanted to wait until I knew what I wanted to study. I'm still weighing my options and saving my pizza delivery money.
  41. I've had crushes on about 60% of my friends without them knowing about it.
  42. Before I die I must (MUST) play the role of Lucy in "You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown"
  43. I'm addicted to three things, in this order: Pepsi, TV, the internet.
  44. I've got one grandparent left. As of this year (2007) she's 97 years and 6 months old.  (Granny passed away in April of 2007.  She had a grand life and I'm hoping to follow in those footsteps.)
  45. She stopped being a grown-up about 3 years ago. Now we treat her much like you handle a toddler.
  46. I don't remember what she used to be like when she was really her and that makes me really mad.
  47. Because of my experiences with the elderly in my life I really don't want to live to be too old. When I can no longer make rational decisions for myself I'd like my last decision to be "pillow or tall staircase?"
  48. I'm pretty sure that most of my friends, even the truly close ones, find me really annoying about 50% of the time.
  49. However I'm amusing or helpful enough the rest of the time to make it worth the effort. (whew!)
  50. I'm ok with both of those facts, but I prefer the second one.
  51. Spiders make me very uneasy, but I love snakes.
  52. My knees can bend backwards, thanks to kneecaps that are too high.
  53. It's a cool party trick, but my Mom and Sister won't let me do it. Something about it being bad for my knees. Whatever!
  54. I'd like to have a kid some day, but the later it gets the less likely it seems.
  55. I throw like a girl, but I shoot like a dame.
  56. I know all the lyrics to "Bust a Move" by Young MC
  57. Also the lyrics to many Sondheim tunes, most Cat Stevens songs and practically all Barenaked Ladies jams.
  58. I don't ever want to meet someone who has my birthday. I prefer to be 100% selfish on my birthday and if I share it with someone I'd have to be considerate of their feelings.
  59. Dark chocolate is SO much better then any other chocolate. Heck, white chocolate isn't even really chocolate!
  60. My favorite fancy candy is dark chocolate covered caramels. My favorite cheap candy would be Nutty Bars
  61. I live in a duplex next to some guy whom I've never met. Never even seen clearly. For over 3 years.
  62. I hate to cook and, therefore, suck at it.
  63. I also suck at gardening, though I don't hate it so much.
  64. I never, ever watch the news. Instead I get all my television news from Jon Stewart.
  65. But I do listen to the news on NPR every weekday.
  66. I pretty much always listen to all CDs on "shuffle". It's like getting a new CD every time I listen!
  67. I'm allergic to bandaids. I don't know if it's the adhesive or the latex, but either way I get bumps, bumps, ITCHY-ITCHY BUMPS!!
  68. Truthfully I'm hoping it's the adhesive, because apparently most condoms are made of (if you can believe it) LATEX! (remember the bumps? NOT something I want in my "special place")
  69. I always bring my own candy and soda to the movies. It's kind of the cost, but it's also that I can't get there early enough to stand in line for the theater food. Also the very high cost.  And it's expensive.
  70. I'd love to take a martial arts class, but I don't really have the dedication. Or the flexibility. (or the pajamas)
  71. When I was 12 I cut off the tip of my left thumb. They sewed it back on, including stitches through the thumbnail. It killed the nerve endings in the tip of my thumb.
  72. About 6 years later I discovered the nerve endings in my thumb had come back to life. I discovered it by jamming a pin into my thumb, showing off how there were no nerves. SURPRISE!
  73. My dream car is a 1963 Ford Falcon convertible. Sky blue. p-r-e-t-t-y...
  74. I have a big old collection of shot glasses; I don't collect them anymore because I have friends and family who bring them back to me from all over the globe.
  75. Every day I have a 16 oz. glass of milk with ice cubes.
  76. I sometimes dream of giving up and just going for full-on FAT. So much easier, ya know?
  77. I have truly dreadful handwriting. No kidding; I wish that my friend Risky could follow me around and do all my signatures because my name looks so much cooler when she writes it.
  78. Then again, I can type 85-90 words per minute.
  79. My favorite sleep is in a room full of people hanging out and having fun around me.
  80. I am absolutely NOT a MORNING PERSON. People always say "you'd have a much better morning if you'd just go to bed earlier and get a full night's sleep." No. It just doesn't matter what I do the night before: I will always hate mornings.
  81. My hearing is not so good anymore due to years of listening to music in my headphones at the volume level of "stupid-loud"
  82. To compensate I'm a better-then-average lip reader.
  83. And I still listen to music on my headphones at "stupid-loud"
  84. I've never tried any illegal drugs.
  85. But I've had way more then one person's fair share of Jagermeister.
  86. I like my Jagermeister with a Wheat Thin chaser
  87. I don't watch reality shows because they make everyone who watches them look very stupid...
  88. ...except, apparently, Dancing with the Stars when, and only when, I have the flu and am feverish.
  89. I've seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show over 125 times. IN the theaters!
  90. But I'm not in favor of the in-theater casts. They force everyone to stifle their fun for the sake of the casts.
  91. One of my favorite ways to spend time is playing board games. I'm geeky that way. (yes, that way too.)
  92. At the same time I'm not really into video games much. And also don't do sports.
  93. I was a virgin until 1994...
  94. ...and I last "made the beast with two backs" in 1996. (you do the math!)
  95. My people name their cars. The first car I ever paid for myself was a 1965 Chevy Corvair convertible, which I named Stella Star.
  96. My current car is a Mazda 6 Station Wagon I call Hope. 
  97. She got the name because her previous (and only other) owner worked the Obama campaign in 2008.
  98. I am a dead shot when firing small guns like a 22. But I can't get past the kick of the larger caliber guns.
  99. I can cut my own matte board when framing my art
  100. I sucked my thumb until I was 11 years old. I still miss it sometimes.
Now I need to rest. And eat Nutty Bars.

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