Tuesday, February 24, 2009

In search of...

I’m still playing D&D. No, scratch that – I’m totally LOVING playing D&D. LOVING. IT. I love pretending to have weapons and be brave and bold and daring! I also love writing epic, “tan-tara!” filled narratives (for that is how this email-based version of the king of the nerd games is played. We the adventuresome band take our turns by writing out the inner thoughts and outer banter of each of our characters as they make with the great battle and then we stick in the game mechanics like “Massive Colossal Hit-in-the-Head blow, 1D100+50=51, Damage of a poke in the middle eye and Atomic Medieval Wedgie” and see what happens next. It’s excellent.) and strategizing ala “gosh, I don’t know. How do YOU think we should destroy this 8-ft tall, man-eating blamange?”

Seriously, I am enjoying this way more then I expected. Also I’m loving all this time with my nerd buddies. I’ve known these guys since they were short with round faces and no CHANCE with girls. Now they’re big, tall, handsome guys with excellent career options and SUPER-HOT wives, but deep down inside? Nerds. Total nerds. In the words of Fred “The Ogre” Palowakski: N-E-E-E-E-E-R-R-R-R-D-S-!

However recently I’ve realized that they’re also my dream guy.

Not them specifically, because a) they’re basically my little brothers, b) they’re married, c) to my friends (in one case even my BEST friend!) and/or d) Dude, my LITTLE BROTHERS!, but more of a nerdish guy like these guys happen to be. My hanging with these paragons of nerd virtue (nerdtue, if you will) have caused me to realize that what I want from a guy is a quality nerd! Someone who will find me awesome when I quote Star Wars (“let the wookie win”) or when I know who would win in a battle between Batman and Superman (Batman of course) Someone who finds tough girls hot and smart girls hot and tough, smart girls MOST HOT OF ALL.

After I made this nerdization I started thinking about how my favorite guys in the world are ALL nerds! The spouses of all of my girl friends and most of my family members are nerds. All my buddies from high school or earlier were nerds and if I’m still friends they’re still nerds. Guys I think are cool on tv are pretty much nerds. (either that or space-cowboys. But mostly nerds) I just really like the species of dude that we call? Nerd.

So now here’s my problem: where does one go to find a single, adult male nerd?

Because in my experience the nerds that are still single at my age are mostly of the “wears his coat 24/7, has his hair long but doesn’t waste time on that “shampoo” crap, does the fish handshake and ends every sentence with “and what have you.”” Type. (shudder) This I will pass on, thank you.

If anyone out there knows where one would meet appealing, single nerd guys please tell me where this would be! I am for them, James Kirk!

1 comment:

Risky said...

You are so damned funny! I laughed out loud at this post at least 5 times. And not that texting LOL where you are trying to convey that you were just kidding either but actually laughing *out loud*. :D And I am right there with you about nerdy guys - or girls for that matter. Yummy!