So I think I know what I want to be when I grow up. That would be my “good news.” The “bad news” is that it’s a super-not-easy goal and something I’d have to try to do while having my day job and there’s no guarantee of success and even if I DO succeed at being this thing that I want to be I might still have to keep my day job and did I mention that the thing I want to do is NOT my current day job? Yeah. Well.
I’d really enjoy to be a writer. A professional, published, “hey, would you like my card? My card that says “Writer” in the title?”-type writer. The reasons why I think I want to do this for a living is that it would be something I could do from the comfort of my own home (or heck, if I could finally get a laptop I could do it from my own bed! Or could you imagine writing a novel entirely from your happy little toilet? Awesome…), it would let me use my imagination (currently only utilized in this job when I have to send emails shaming people for their deplorable fridge etiquette) and its something I truly enjoy doing.
So if I’m gonna be this I gotta get going. Rumor has it that writing a book could take a little while. A few days, possibly some weeks, heck maybe even a month or three! (or, you know, the rest of my life…) I’d just LOVE to get started on this, my “change my whole life and give me an actual career and a reason to get up each morning and be the key to my entire happiness” novel (tentatively called “No Pressure, baby!”) but first I have to do the dishes. And clean the kitchen, and the living room, and there are still some Christmas decorations I haven’t figured out how to put away yet, and also the stack of old bills in the office that fill and entire 10-gallon plastic butterfly bin (at least until I file them, which I’m gonna do any day now) and I just started this very cool jigsaw puzzle of spices…
So here’s the plan. (shut up, I do too have a plan. Yes I do, and shut up.) I’m going to take January, and probably 1-2 weeks in February, and get my danged life in order. I’m going to CLEAN that kitchen, and PUT AWAY those Christmas decorations, and FILE those… SHRED those old bills and just generally get on top of the big pile of unmanaged crap that is currently my life! Once that’s done I’ll sit down and start putting word to paper. I make no promises to having a full plot at that point, as right now I have 3 cool ideas, a phrase and a title. How does this grab you: “Mr. Pennywhistle Kills you and your Pope: a love story/cook book”
No fair stealing it for your own “change your whole life and give you an actual career and a reason to get up each morning and be the key to your entire happiness” book.
For those of you who know that I am a dedicated reader of such blogs as Dooce.com and Faster Than Kudzu, and who think that I’m totally copying them and expecting my life to be as killer as theirs are just because I write a book I have one word: TOTALLY. (and I DO SO have a PLAN – SHUUUUUUUT UUUUUUUUUP!!!!!!)
(and I totally meant to write to Mr. Carl this weekend, but I partied at my Dad’s b-day bash until 4:30am on Saturday and then there was the ever-important ‘sleeping in’ on Sunday, followed by some hardcore sitting on the couch thinking that I should really get up and clean something. So who had the time to write?)